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Thought for the day

Many times people confuse God with religion and walk away from both!

What God is like?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGv0BEx0nQ4

Humbling lesson

Once again I am reading a book called Purpose Driven Life. When it was popular in Estonia and lots of churches were reading it, having fellowship and discussion groups on the book, I remember that the group I was part of somehow did not work.

People were coming and going and there was no consistency. And even though this book was very popular, somehow I was not too keen on it at all.

But one day just some weeks ago, Christmas time my mom went out to buy a Christmas tree. She started to talk to the salesman about the real meaning of Christmas. The man seemed interested and asked questions.

My mother came home to leave the Christmas tree and to go back to the salesman. She wanted to give him something and she started to look for something to give - a book or something for the man to read.

As my mom did not find anything I went to my bookshelve and started to look for a book I could give away. Unfortunately most of my Christian books are in English!

Finally I found the Purpose Driven Life in Estonian. It had my name in it and some of the places were underlined. I told my mother - If you want you can give this book. I am sure this will help the man understand better real meaning of life, God and Christ.

My mother really liked the idea and went to give it to him. Unfortunately by that time the salesman had finished his day and had left. My mom came back with the book and gave it back to me.

Suddenly I realized - it was not an accident that I pulled this book out of my shelve. Maybe God is trying to tell me something!

So I started to read it in the mornings just before going to work. And I was so encouraged from the moment I opened the contents of the book.

The contents had 6 main chapters:

• Why I am on this earth?
• You have been designed for the Gods gratification
• You have been prepared to belong to Gods family
• You have been created to become Christ-like
• You have been designed to serve God
• You have been created to fulfill one task

And then it just hit me - in the contents becoming Christ-like is mentioned before serving God or fulfilling God-given task.

For many years I have been so God-serving and task-fulfilling oriented that I had totally forgot that the primary thing is actually for ME TO BE CHANGED and BECOMING CHRISTE-LIKE and THEN sharing the gospel and inviting people to join Gods family!

I was shocked! How could I have forgotton that! I have been so busy with trying to find out my personal calling in service that I totally forgot that FIRST God wants to change me. Everey day!

Then the puzzle of my life started to take shape - for the last 2 years I have felt like God has been polishing me, humbling me, taking away from me and shaping me. It has been difficult yet life-changing experiencde.

Still in the midst of it I have felt quilty that I have not been more effective serving others and bringing them to Christ. I have shared Christ whenever I could but I always felt like I was not using my full potential and that a lot of me and my energy actually went for dealing with the emotional difficulties I had.

God opened my eyes the day I opened the book again! Praise the Lord that He has opened my eyes to see what He is doing in my life and that it is OK and NECESSARY that He is working on ME right now and changing me in such deep ways that have never been changed before. Praise the Lord that he is taking bit by bit away my SELFISHNESS and PRIDE!

Now I see that IT IS MY TIME! That God is actually preparing me so that he could be more clear about my calling! Now I see that for the first time God has opened my eyes to see my other heart desires beside serving him in the world. God has opened my eyes to see my personal need for family and close relationship with God-loving man.

Now I see that God is shaping me to be a better person in close relationships and changing my views of sharing Gospel.

God who is a relationship God is showing me that the only way to reach out is to be HUMAN BEING - with my faults and mistakes and sins that he has promised to wash away. God has shown me that the best witness I can give to people is to be HUMAN BEING totally dependant of GOD and aware of my own sin and Gods grace!

Now I see that no matter how well I know Bible, no matter how many people I talk to about God, no matter how often I pray, no matter how frequently I read Bible and go to church - if my life is not TOTALLY CHANGED and I am not BROKEN like Jesus was broken on the cross, God cannot use me comlletely and help me fulfill His plan!

Praise the Lord for the brokenness because after that comes glory!

6 men i like+something that is missing=the MAN

I have always had difficulties describing the man I like. I have always known what I like about certain men and people in general but I have never really known what I wish to see in my future husband.

Many times I have known what a Christian woman should look in a man and have made decisions according to this knowledge but I have never understood my OWN heart desire.

I have never even made a list of a perfect man (like so many Christian women do) and I have never put too much effort in discovering that area. I think I have not been ready before or maybe I just enjoyed the privilige of being free and doing things I like.

Or maybe I have been too busy with building my Christian life and trying to grow spiritually that I have actually neglected the natural every day life desire and calling from God - to get married unless you have been called to be single and serve God as single.

One thing I know after being in long relationship and hoping that it would be it, the one - IT IS NOT MY CALLING TO BE SINGLE! And I am very thankful for what I have learned!

And then there has never been any pressure from anybody - society, family, friends, church etc. Today when people have more freedom, it is OK or even MUST that people go after freedom and do not make any commitment or lifelong decisions! Unfortunately that goes with us Christians so many times as well.

In that sence we have become like the world! We enjoy the fellowship of a group but are scared or for any other reason do not start new fellowships from zero. That also goes for marriages. There are more single young Christians than married. Or at least this is what I have noticed.

But somehow God is working in my heart and getting more and more my attention to this topic.

Whilst reading a book sent by Mary Lou to me today (Love worth the wait by Sandy Weyeneth) I realized there are 6 men in my life that I really like and who`s company I enjoy. They are just people I know, nothing more. Some of them interested in me and have expressed they realliy like me (what ever that means nowadays!). But it is just that!

I discovered I like:

• One for the good heart and manners
• One for the passion for work and children
• One for sence of humor
• One for culture and philosophy oriented mind
• One for adventurous heart
• One for eagerness and hard-working mentality

Only one of them is Christian and I realized they all were lacking (I don`t know about the Christian though) one common thing - PASSION FOR CHRIST!

I realized or you could say I was confirmed again that this is the most important thing to me and yet I feel that if a man has the passion for Christ but is lacking all or some of the characteristics mentioned above, he would not be suitable for me as well.

You see, I have discovered a profile of a man I would like to marry....don`t know what God things about this profile yet!

I like A MAN with:

• Passion for Christ and people around
• Good heart and manners
• Passion for his work (calling according to his talents, doesn`t mean working in church, might be working in the world and being a light and witness at the workplace) and passion for children
• Sence of humor
• Interest in other cultures and philosphies, yet sure of his own belief
• Adventurous heart
• Eagerness (takes initiative) and hard-working mentality (not scared to go wisely after what he wants)

So far I have not met a man that has all the 7 qualities. At least this is the way things look to me right now. We will see what God has to teach and show me about that!

Thank you Lord for helping me to recognize my needs, dreams and wishes! Thank you for teaching me how to live purposful life with this desire and dream every day!